I'm "Burnin Up" for you Travis

I have on occasion found it necessary to wear a dark article of clothing despite my penchant for dressing flamboyantly.  As a child I could always bring a smile to Papa's face by putting together a colorful outfit.

"Why my dear Tillie you look positively smashing!" Daddy would gush.

Sometimes he would dress up with me and we would put make-up on each other but that was only when Mummy would go into town to the feed store.

Friday called for a stealthy ensemble and so I put together all of my darkest clothes.  Despite my cat like reflexes and best imitation of a ninja, things went awry.  I've just spent the last 24 hours recuperating and listening to the Jonas Brothers 2008 album "A Little Bit Longer".  I'm feeling better already and will spend tomorrow practicing my Oscar clap for when Travis accepts the award.

My next adventure will be a success if I keep a few things in mind.

Notes to self.....

1. It's a bad idea to wear a belt with one small buckle while forcing your way through a package delivery door because once the belt breaks you're pretty much stuck.

2. Not all press is good press.  Thankfully I was face down when the firefighters, glass cutters and locksmiths or what the local news called collectively a "band of heroes" liberated me from the service entrance in Travis' office building at midnight.

3. When owning 14 1/2 cats, a wise person will empty the litter boxes before leaving the house on an adventure that could take more than 8 hours.

Travis watch Day 1

Only 5 hours into my daily devotion and my efforts have been thwarted by some peon in a uniform and badge asking me to move my vehicle from the loading zone behind the Temple of Travis(his office building).

I was fully prepared to spend my days writing Travis poetry while enjoying the proximity of this demigod and possibly catching a glimpse of him entering and exiting the building 8 hours later.

5 gallon canister of cheeseballs?  Check

Hello Kitty pen and notepad?  Check

2 liters of Red Bull?  Check

Adult diaper covered by bedazzled jeggings?  Check

"I don't want to miss a thing" by Aerosmith set to loop continuously?  Check

When the "officer" approached my car I *rolled down the window and tried to explain how important it was that I remain here.  Sure I had been crying at the beauty of my own poetry and had mascara running down my face and yes my mouth was covered with orange powder and mouth stuffed to capacity with cheeseyballs but I could tell he wanted me.  Alas my heart mind and body belong to Travis. 

My plans will have to change now and they may involve surveillance cameras and a possible break in tonight.

*I opted for the windows that roll down because I don't want to be caught under water with electrical windows being the cause of my drowning.  Nevermind that I do not live near any body of water.  People in movies die this way ALL the time and I refuse to be yet another casualty of "technology".

oh Travis my love.....

From the moment I saw him across the floor I was smitten.  He was the only other adult over the age of 40 at the Jonas Brothers concert that wasn't drooling at the stage.  I watched mesmerized as he swayed when they swayed, dipped when they dipped.  He knew every move.  Mouthing the words to every song with his perfect mouth and distinguished mustache that rivaled my own.  All 250 pounds of me was a quiver.  Thank the lord in heaven that I am only 5 feet tall and blended in with the sea of teens for I was not ready to reveal myself to my love just yet.

I followed him home and googled his address on my phone in front of his house.  He was magnificent and clearly meant for me.  I could barely contain myself as I drove home sifting through the many pictures I had taken of him throughout the night.

I ran in the front door knocking 3 cats out of the way in my haste as I headed for the laundry room and peeled off my size 28 jeans and soaked them in the washer because wet jeans make for a particularly violent dryer cycle.  After spending a good hour on top of the dryer thumbing through the pictures I was exhausted.

It was clear....it was true love.